Bad, yet proud, mommy moment

I make it very clear to anyone who knows me that I allow my children to learn through experience. I won't shelter my children thinking it will protect them. I want them to experience, explore and learn through their triumphs and mistakes. Please don't get me wrong, I would never in my life put my child in harms way to learn a lesson, and I will also protect them to the best of my ability. Given that, I will not always be with my children 24/7 and believe that at some point in life, they need to learn to defend their own. I try to instill in my kids that it is ok to share their opinions, and to always be outspoken. I teach them that it is important to respect others and always keep an open mind when someone does, says, or feels a way you may not agree with. Along those lines, I also teach them to never change themselves in any way just to fall into anothers path of thinking. Don't let others change your views and stand strong in what you believe in.

Ok, so now onto my little story. As Alexis is going away to kindergarden in September, Ive come to realize that my little baby will no longer be under my wings all day. I can't always be there to stick up for her, help her with issues and hold her hand in a situation she may find frightfull. Ive had to teach her to use her independance in positive ways, trust in herself and to trust her instints. Its been hard, as I like her feeling safe and knowing mommy is always going to be there.

Monday night I took Alexis to watch her cousins soccer game. Alexis herself plays, and is alittle unsure of the sport and having her watch her big cousin playing seems to help her wanting to play herself. Normally we go as a family, but Brooklyn was overtired and daddy had some plays he needed to run to. He decided to keep Brooklyn home and walk into town and head to a few stores, knowing she would fall asleep on the way. I took Alexis with me and we headed to the field.

Normally she will watch 1/2 the game, get bored, and want to go play. Her and her cousin Kaitlyne decided they wanted to go to the park. Luckily, it is right beside the field they were playing at. So I sat on the step to the park, while being able to watch the game as well as my baby playing. A few minutes into her fun time, she game running to me complaining that a girl was being mean to her. I asked her what she was doing, and she said throwing rocks at her face. I said ok sweetie, remember when someone is doing something mean to you, ask them nicely to stop and tell them you dont like what they are doing. So she runs back and I see her talking to the little girl, who laughs and runs away. Fine by me, she did what she knew she was supposed to. Given this girl was about 8-9yrs old I was proud of my little 3yr old girl being respectful and the bigger person.

A few minutes later, Alexis runs up to me again crying saying the girl was still throwing rocks at her. This time I came up with her, and stood there as she asked the girl to stop. The girl started laughing and said no. At this point, I asked her myself and told her that I would like her to stop throwing rocks at the other children. The little girl ran away. Instead of keeping my eyes on the soccer game, I stood by on the side and watched the kids interact. Alexis was sliding down the slide and when she reached the bottom, the little girl came running up to her and threw rocks in her face. God what a brat! I started to walk towards them and the little girl saw me and ran to her father. Great, thank you! I walked over to the little girl and her father and told him what was going on, and explained that my 3yr old and myself had asked her to stop throwing rocks in her face. THe little girl laughed, and the father said "kids will be kids". I was fuming, swore, and walked away. The little girl ran over to where Alexis and Kati were, and I was standing there with them. She just stood there with a sneer on her face. I bent down to Alexis and simply said "sweetie, if this girl does not stop bugging you, I give you permission to knock her out". Alexis replied "what?" I said "Permission hunny, to hit her!" Then, I walked away. God that felt good, and the little girl went running to her father. He came over to me and asked what I told my daughter to do and I said to him "knock her out, and if you dont stop, Ill knock YOU out" and walked away, alexis in hand, and got a freezie from the snack bar.

Call me a bad mommy, thats fine. Unfortunatly I feel it was in my daughters best interest to teach her that at certain points in life, you may have to defend yourself. Luckily, i know my daughter very well. I know for certain she wouldn't hit another without absolute belief that she was in danger and it was her last option. I sat her down at home afterwards and explained to her how it is not proper to put your hands on another person, unless in specific circumstances, and explained those situations to her. She seemed to take it all in, and i trust she did being such a smart little girl.